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Well, here we go. I didn't do one of these earlier this month, so I'll do one at the end. And, hey, maybe I'll mention fanfic, maybe I won't, we will see.
Yep, I'm doing an actual rambling. All my other "ramblings" ended up beign thought out before being written. This? Well, while it does have a central theme, at the moment, i have no idea what the hell I'm gonna say.
So, let's begin.
***
Wow. 2000. It's right around the corner, for some it's already here. For me, let's see, I have a little over 7 hours. Wow.
Remember when you were little and you drew pictures in first grade about "The Future!" You know, those picture of what it would be like in 2000, all those hovercars and buildings on towers, the whole Jetsons thing going.
Man, were we wrong.
But, look at the world today. Never would I have imagined myself doing this, typing on my computer a little note that I'm about to send to a bunch of folks around the world that I've never met face to face. And you'll get this moments after I send it! WOW!
2000. It's just another number, but it seemed so far away when I was 6. 1985, Cold War, Catholic School First Grade, the world was gonna end before I would see 2000.
Hovercars. Heh. How the hell would those work? I mean, really? I know there are hover things that float a few feet above the ground and all, but those Jetson things are hundres of feet up! They're practically airplanes without wings! So, we're tootin along in our hover car, when, suddenly we pass over a building. BAM! We're shot up 200 feet. then we finish passing over the building. BAM! We drop 200 feet. Talk about whiplash.
And robots, where are the freakin robots that were gonna do everything, from cook and clean to play catch with the kids? Future my asinine comments!
And are we on Mars yet? Noooooo. We keep shotting balls of metal at it, only to have them burn up on entry, THAT'S scientific progress! We aren't even on the Moon yet! Sheesh.
Techonology has failed me. You know, I was all looking forward to my hover-boots and talking robotic dog named Reynolds Wrap, but instead I get gigapets and Pokemon.
...and fanfiction! (There it is, the mention of fanfic!)
So, instead of all this neat high-tech stuff that makes my life physically more fun, I get this mentally fun stuff from my computer. Now, this is a long way from that amber screened Apple IIe. Not much, considering it's a 486/66 with half a gig hard drive, but, hey, it's the future!
Oh well, despite all my bitching, one thing remains the same for me since I was 6. Yep, the one golden goal I've been looking forward to since I could even conceive it's use.
21 years of age.
Okay, so it's a purely American Dream, but it's my American Dream, and, barring any act of God or invention of some age reversing device, I will legally make a fool out of myself in a few months. Future or not, there will always be cheap booze that tastes like crap but makes you forget that fact anyway after a few.
Okay, so I've rambled enough, I figure I've given you all enough of me for the month/year.
So, to everyone out there, Happy New Year, and remember, the new mellennium does NOT start in 2000, it's 2001. Same with the century. Don't ask me to explain it, just take my word for it. I'm Jason. I know what I'm talking about. Now. Unlike when I was 6. I was a wee fool then. Now I'm a not-so-wee fool. That makes all the difference.
Jason Kenney
12.31.99
the end of the world is neigh
or not
